The Ways I Died
by Gracidea of the Valley
Summary: Fall. Die. Reset. Fall. Survive. Reset. Fall. Die. Reset. Fall. Survive. Reset. Fall. Die. Reset. The same cycle, over and over and over... Some of the runs end badly, and Frisk is glad for them to end. Some of the runs end without warning. Not all runs are pleasant. Some end worse than others. Why does the world keep Reseting? Why? Based on the song of the same name. Heavy angst.
1. Chapter 1

Welcome to The Ways I've Died, an Undertale fic.

 **Warning: This is super angsty. Someone dies at least once every chapter, with thoughts of suicide, depression, and all sorts of stuff.**

Why? Well, this idea stuck with me and wouldn't leave, even after a year of trying to ignore it. Secondly, I wanted to take a spin on the whole Frisk-Chara "Chara is evil!" relationship, and all that fun stuff that the fandom bickers about. Great times.

Anyway, this is looking to be about 30 chapters or so, with a new chapter every day.

(BTW, Fighter's Block is great. I have a 500 word minimum for each chapter (I hope), and that 'game' (or is it _really_ just a game... *hee*) helps me challenge my writing block.

Character used for this chapter: Karen, bookkeeper.

~Inspired Gracidea

* * *

 _"My soul is paralyzed"_

* * *

Fall. Die. Reset. Fall. Survive. Reset. Fall. Die. Reset. Fall. Survive. Reset. Fall. Die. Reset.

It was a never-ending cycle. Wake up in a bed of golden flowers, traverse first the ruins and then the underground. Meet Toriel, the Skelebros, Undyne, Alphys, Mettaton, and Asgore. Visit Snowdin, Hotland, the Waterfall, the throne room. Eat pie, donuts, hot cats, ice cream, spaghetti. Fight and spare. Fight and spare. Spare and fight. Find items hidden in the snow, offer a cup of water to a dehydrated fish. Wake up in a bed of golden flowers again.

It was just...tiring. So tiring. True, Frisk never grew tired of spending time with Toriel, of swapping puns with sans, going on "dates" with Papyrus, visiting Grillby's and Muffet's Bakery, alternatively. They never stopped encouraging Undyne and Alphys, never got tired of seeing Mettaton achieve his dream. They were never grew tired of seeing the Underground, and how beautiful it was compared to the Surface.

But...they were tired. Tired of the Resets. Tired of having to run through the same lines with those they loved. Tired of waking up in a bed of golden flowers, knowing that they had achieved a happy ending, only for it to slip out of their fingers. Tired of waking up in relief that whatever force had compelled them to slaughter the monsters of the Underground had fallen silent, slinking into the back of their mind. Tired of the voices in their head, that spoke nonsense half the time. Tired of their limbs being tugged in directions they did not want to go, sometimes gently, sometimes with so much force it made them cry out. Tired of seeing Sans' tired face, aware as they were that the world had changed around them. Tired of saving Asriel, of saving everyone, only for all that hard work to vanish when the world faded to black.

There was no pattern. No sense to the madness. Frisk had forgotten how many times the world had been Reset. Forgotten how many times they had achieved each different ending. Being allowed onto the surface, to let the monsters see the surface, to see the sunrise. Being caught unaware in an unfortunate situation that led to the "Game Over" Reset. Being slain by Asgore, Flowey, or Undyne. Being stopped in the Judgement Hall, sans standing over their broken soul. Those were the best endings when the voices screamed for them to kill the monsters. If no one else would stop them, sans would. But then there were times when sans failed, when they landed a killing blow on him. Those were the worst.

Fall. Die. Reset. Fall. Survive. Reset. Fall. Die. Reset. Fall. Survive. Reset. Fall. Die. Reset.

They were currently sitting in a chair in Toriel's house on the Surface, staring at a piece of cinnamon pie. The world had been quiet recently. Too quiet. It was going to happen again. The world was going to Reset.

This run was one of the neutral ones. Which wasn't the worst thing that could happen. Recently, the runs had swung in extremes. Pacifist. Genocide. A different Genocide. A nearly perfect Pacifist. A dusty Genocide.

*Are you not hungry, my child? Toriel asked, head tilted in concern.

*You tell her dinner filled you up, and that you're going to sleep.

*Very well, my child. She rose, placing a furry kiss on Frisk's head. *Sleep well.

Frisk nodded, climbing the stairs to their room, sliding under the covers. With one hand, they sent a message to sans.

*[Still here. Morning soon.]

They would not Reset. They never Reset. But something else would. So they had to comfort each other as best they could. The two, sometimes three, who were aware.

*sleep tight, kiddo.

*You thank sans, tucking your phone under your pillow. You eventually fall asleep.

* * *

When Frisk wakes up, they are lying on a bed of golden flowers.

*Déjà vu, huh?


	2. Chapter 2

Welcome to the second part of The Ways I've Died. I know this is late, but even though I started this as a means of chunking out time to practice my writing, life is reaching an end stage right now, and it seems that everything is due at once. Please bear with me.

Also, fights will occasionally deviate from normal gameplay for the sake of the story. Just an FYI

~Inspired Gracidea

* * *

 _"Those bones are twice my size"_

* * *

You're not sure what to think of Papyrus. Since you first encountered the taller skeleton, your opinion has been swinging back and forth.

On one hand, he seems like the type that wouldn't even be able to hurt a fly. He just seems...so fluffy. Which is an odd statement for a skeleton.

On the other hand, those traps you've been encountering aren't very fun. You've Reset at least twice because of them. Thankfully you took sans advice and avoided the conspicuously placed plate of spaghetti, but still.

You're fairly certain you've seen this type of person, or you suppose, monster, before. Someone who puts out one front while having different goals. It's too early to tell, but you're not certain how fully devoted he is to catching humans, and if he's a threat.

...Or he's just overrated, well-meaning like the other monsters you've encountered in the Underground thus far. You can't be sure. Sure, sans says he's a human fanatic...but you're not sure what a fanatic is. The best you can guess, it's someone who's easily excited by something.

In this case, Papyrus is easily excited by capturing humans. You're very thrilled by the prospect. What being captured entails, you're not sure. The simplest way to find out would be to let him capture you. If it goes wrong, you can always Reset. Even though it would be a major pain.

And that's how you ended up here, your Soul exposed in battle, with Papyrus opposite you.

* Papyrus blocks the way!

Slowly, you navigate your Soul, checking.

* Papyrus 8 ATK 2 DEF He likes to say "NYEH HEH HEH!"

And right on que, there comes a loud,

* NYEH HEH HEH!

The first bones that come your way are small, and you can easily hop over them.

* Papyrus is cackling.

You decide to insult.

* The spaghetti you left gave me "regret-tis"!

When did you start punning?

The next bones that come your way require some extra "UMPH!" to avoid.

* WELL DONE HUMAN! YOU'RE VERY GOOD AT JUMPING.

You decide to take the compliment.

* LET'S SEE HOW WELL YOU HANDLE MY "BLUE ATTACK"!

Oh, so this was what sans was warning you about earlier. The bones that come after you are blue, and about half your height. Thankfully, there's nothing special about this attack. It's the same type of magic that the dog used earlier. You know not to move, even though the bones are growing taller and taller, and it takes all your effort not to flinch when they pass through you. Some swing right over you, missing completely.

Insulting got you nowhere, so you decide 'to heck with it' and select Flirt.

* W-WHAT? FLIRTING? SO! YOU FINALLY REVEAL YOUR ULTIMATE FEELINGS! WELL! I AM A SKELETON WITH VERY HIGH STANDARDS!

Two options appear before you. Considering the spaghetti that was left behind, you select the option that you can make spaghetti. That's probably not true, considering you're just a child, and Toriel did tell you to stay out of the drawers in the kitchen. But a little fib won't hurt, right?

* WHAT?! YOU'RE MEETING ALL MY STANDARDS!

Papyrus looks hesitant, and for a moment, you feel relieved. Maybe he'll let you go on your way. But you've never fought him before, and don't know what to expect next.

* HOWEVER-!

You can't turn around fast enough, and a normal bone connects with you back, knocking down you HP. What is new, however, is that your normally Red Soul has turned Blue. You reach up to feel your soul. It feels heavier than normal. You try leaping, but immediately land.

* You're blue now.

And what does being blue entail? You're very nervous. Not being able to jump to avoid attacks is a bit of a problem. Papyrus sends normal bones at you, and even though they're only up to your ankles, you have a very hard time dodging. Near the end of the attack, you trip, colliding with three bones, knocking down your HP. This is not looking very good.

* Papyrus is thinking about what to wear for his date.

Well that's helpful! Assuming you even survive to go on a date.

...actually, this is looking very bad. The size of the bones have doubled, at least twice your size. The first bone slams into you, knocking you down, and you can't get up. The next bone that looms over you is the last thing you see.

 **CRACK!**

* * *

 **GAME OVER**


	3. Chapter 3

Hello. I'm back.

Oh, the fighter for this was Red, same as last chapter (don't think I mentioned it then.

Happy reading! Stay Determined!

~Inspired Gracidea

* * *

 _"Remember, don't move if they're blue..."_

* * *

You've come to associate several different things with the Judgement Hall.

The first is EXP, or Execution Points, and LOVE, Level Of ViolencE. You remember your first run, when you ran into sans, and he explained what they were. That was a neutral run, so you didn't associate anything else with the Judgement Hall. True, san's disappearing act was weird, but that was earlier in your runs, before you suspected anything about the "laziest sentry in the Underground."

The second thing you now associate with the Judgement Hall is...well...judgement. At the end of your first Genocide run, you met sans, not sure what to expect. After taking off Papryrus's head for some easy EXP, you didn't see the smaller skeleton again. The few runs you had before that had him popping up in various places, like in Snowdin, MTT Resort, and the different guard houses scattered across the underground. But on that run, he had truly vanished. You didn't suspect anything was wrong with it, since certain monsters didn't appear the further in you went with the run.

Then he broke your soul in five seconds flat. First, you weren't sure what happened. Second, you could only stare at the 'GAME OVER' message in shock. Then came the swearing and frustration. The next runs after that were Geno-runs. Some were murdering every monster in sight, some were carefully choosing who to kill. The result was the same. Each time you reached the Judgement Hall, you met sans, and he judged you. Judged you so hard your soul decided to snap into nice, tiny little pieces and you got shipped back to that bed of golden flowers.

You're more than a bit salty about it all.

Stupid skeleton. Although you would be angry if someone decided to kill your bro. Whatever.

Eventually, you went back to different routes. Neutral, Pacifist, dropping into Genocide occasionally. Wondering if there was a pattern you could identify, that you could use. There was never a pattern. The characters would still be the same smiling faces, going about their business as usual.

...Eeeexxxxcept for sans. Who seemed to never forget. He knew when you were running Genocide, because he would ask you to "act human."

Every Genocide led you to the Judgement Hall. And every time, you died. The fights always end in one frustrating death or another. Assuming you can survive the first round of attacks (there was a pattern, you figured out after multiple runs: Blue soul, sea of bones, three different four-way blaster attacks before a two-pronged blaster attack), the attack patterns go randomly. Wall of bones, blue soul, blaster attacks, sometimes combined.

In this Geno-run, you've lasted longer than usual. You dodged the first round of attacks with practiced ease, carefully balancing consuming food and throwing out attacks. The blasters are predictable, but the bones are the worst in this run. They're as thick as your body and hard as stone. The damage may be minimal, but the hurt is pretty high.

sans is standing across from you, and when you lung for an attack, he flings your Soul into the pillars nearby. Red Determination helps counter the Blue magic, and you avoid the bones that pop out seconds after you push off from the wall. sans is getting worn down, you can tell. But he hasn't given up, and neither have you.

* yeah, my special attack. sound familiar?

Yes; if you remember correctly, that's what Papyrus called his Blue attack in a Neutral run that seems so long ago.

* well, get ready. cause after the next move, i'm going to use it.

Attack, dodge, a counteract that you dodge equally well.

* so, if you don't want to see it, now would be a good time to die.

You scoff. Sorry sans, but you're not going to roll over and die. The next round of blasters come a bit close to your Soul, but a quick bite of food heals you right up.

* so...get ready for my special attack.

sans slams your soul around for a while before chucking it, and you, down a line of bones. They're white, and you navigate through them easily.

Then all of a sudden, they're alternating blue and white. You try to dodge a white bone, but collide with a blue bone. Trying to correct your trajectory, you try to turn, only to slam into a white bone. When you come to the end of the line and collapse on the floor, the sound of bones popping up through the floor forces you up. The line is getting closer, and closer, and you jump.

But the bones that pop up from under your feet are blue, and that's the last bit of damage you need...

Of course you'd fall for the attack _sans_ warned you about in the Neutral ...

 ** _ping_**

* * *

GAME OVER


End file.
